Fischer's thoughts

On the way out of the hospital Fischer asked me if spirits could make it snow? I told him his mommy's sure could. We all know how she loved the snow!

And he said "It looks like confetti, like mommy is celebrating getting her wings".

So now everytime it snows, that's what I will believe too.

Bobby O.

Katie O has got her wings

Greetings all,

I just wanted to share with you that my precious, beautiful, wonderful love got her wings and flew away this morning.



She had been in the hospital for over a week with incredible pain in her neck and head. Yesterday her breathing pattern changed and this morning she passed on to the next world.



Fischer and I spent the night with her last night, we had a slumber party and opening Christmas presents. I got up several times during the night to lay with her and talk to her and let he know it was ok to go and that her boys would be ok. But typical Katie, she did not want to hurt us or have us see her passing so she waited until just after we left to go see how Ziggi and company were doing.



On the drive back to the hospital we saw the shape of an eagle in the clouds just below the sun, the only gap in the clouds in the entire valley. For those of you who don’t know, the bald eagle has been Katie’s source of strength and inspiration though out the past two years of health challenges. We got to give her body some last hugs, kisses and words but we knew she was already soaring high above.



Katie’s sister Stacy and I are incredibly relieved that she is suffering no longer. That was harder to watch than hearing she is finally free for me. Anyone who knows Katie knows she hated laying there unable to do all those wonderful things she did… running, biking, skiing, laughing, playing, hugging, skinny dipping, etc.



The love and support for Katie and her boys has been overwhelming and I am truly grateful for all of you and for ten incredible years with my perfect match, my true love, my princess Katherine Isabella Ossa.



Thank you all so much for being a part of our lives and I hope that continues.



I love you all,

Bobby O.

Bumpy Road

Hey all - T posting again for Katie & Bob, so I guess you can tell that things may not be going so well. Good news is that things are at least better than they were earlier in the week. So, for those not in the know, Katie is back in the hospital here in Bozeman. She was admitted early Wednesday morning with a bad headache they couldn't get a handle on at home. It's been up and down this week and elaboration will come with the next post. For now, Bob has asked me to update the blog so everyone can know a little more and understand why they haven't been in contact so much. Although they haven't been able to reach out and communicate with many of you, I know that your thoughts, prayers, wishes, - everything means so much to them and if they could answer every phone call and talk to each and every one of you, they would. But for now, it seems just living and concentrating on each moment at hand is monumental in itself. Katie was awake and alert for much of the day, yesterday - but a long, rough, sleepless night has left her worn out today. I anticipate writing a more complete post later today after another update from Bob and to fill you all in on the week. Until then, feel free to post comments for KO & Co. here and Bob will be reading them to her in the hospital. We love you Katie, Bob, & Fischer (Ziggi, too!)

Hello to all it's Ko!
I'm updating this with my terrible eyesight. so forgive me for all the typos etc. people are wondering if it is ok to come and visit. so far I am not ready for a slew of people. I'm still healing and trying to function through the day on my own. there are a couple of people coming up but you know it will be self maintainence. I'm not driving yet and am still overwhelmed by trying to heal every day. I do look foward to
greg cooking!


check out this fabulous website

http://www.winslowstudio.com/ossa/

The hspital set it up with these awesome people from Winslow Studio to take some portraits of the three of us they turned out fantastic! they made a book of portraits for us and we are gonna order a huge print for one of our walls. The difficult part will be which print to pick. Any suggestions?

Thanks and love to you all! I love hearing from you. You are all doing so well in helping to take care of myself and my family amd I'm forever grateful for that!
I loveyou all!
Katie

Katie'sBirthday!!!

Greetings All KO fans,
Today is Katie's birthday! We started off with strawberry and yogurt waffles and yummy left over apple pie. Around lunch time she gets to open presents! Fischer and I have been busy shopping, wrapping and making cards while Kurt and Rebecca Spears hang out with Katie and walk Ziggi. We spent turkey day with Bill and Melanie Schell and Katie would not relinquish the cooking of sweet potato pie and corn pudding so she was very tired the rest of the day, though it was a wonderful day!

Unfortunately we have some unsettling news to mix in with the good news. The cytology report came back with the results we did not want to hear. The report showed that there are still microscopic cancer cells present in Katie's brain and spinal fluid and there is nothing left to try via traditional medical treatments short of putting a port in the top of her head and dumping chemo directly into her brain. And the doctors say that would immediately turn her quality of life to crap and likely be ineffective.

So there you have it: the news we have been wrestling with for a week and it's still not sinking in. There is no crystal ball so we don't know exactly what this news means other than it wasn't the best news. The counselor from the cancer clinic has met with us and shared some wonderful suggestions like legacy books, a video interview, etc. Some wonderful photographers (and they are wonderful people too) volunteered to take our family portrait last weekend. Katie got a new wig and someone came in to do her makeup... it was a great photo shoot and life experience. We will post some photos when we get them. They even let Fischer shoot a couple hundred pictures with their fancy camera.

sorry to drop a bomb like this on everyone, but it's just too intense and heart wrenching to tell the story to each individual that cares so deeply for M'lady.

As always, we sincerely appreciate all the love, support, food and offers to help with anything we need. I honestly don't know where we would be without all of you!

To end on a high note, we finally have internet access at home again so Katie will be able to read and respond to e-mail and blog correspondence when she is feeling up to it during the day.

We love you all so much and look forward to seeing or hearing from you soon.

Bobby O.

...10 days later

T back, again. Well that was a really long day - so much for "more tomorrow"! Sorry it's been awhile, Katie & Bob are still waiting for internet access and have not been able to update. So, KO asked if I would mind updating the blog a bit while they are still offline. It's great to see her back home! The first week's challenges were to get from-bed-out-to-couch...rest...back-to-bed-again. By the end of the week, she was mostly out at the couch and fending for herself during the day. Her appetite is coming back big time, good thing, too - she got kind of scrawny after all that time not being able to eat. She's beginning to eat well again and, moreover, can enjoy what she's eating! So, for week two, she's had plans to go to the grocery store and went out to lunch on Sunday (only 1 week after getting out of the hospital!). She's been helping Bob get more things put away and organized, and putting finishing touches on Fischer's room. She's also starting to get some of her old sass back - she may be tired and not as strong as she likes, but she's already made great strides just since getting home.

So now in a few more days she is hoping to update you all, herself. I know you're all looking forward to that and she and Bob again say huge thank you's to everyone. I'll keep you updated until they're up & running. All for now, T

Update

Just a quick note for tonight - KO is very happy to be home and in her own bed. She makes forays out to the couch on occasion and her appetite is coming back. She feels a bit better everyday and seems to be getting some strength and spice back - go Katie, go!! The climbing benefit was quite a success as many people attended and had a great time connecting, renewing old friendships and acquaintances, and meeting new people, too. Lots of folks seemed to be enjoying the venue, but I think the kids had the best time swinging around upstairs. Thanks to everyone for help making it such a great time for Katie, Bob & Fischer. I saw KO today and she's beautiful as always - tomorrow I'll stop by in the morning and help her post tomorrow's note, so stay tuned for that!

For now, I'll sign off - more tomorrow...
T

She's home, she's home, she's HOME!

Yep, it's true - Katie is back home. She was discharged yesterday and Bob, Fischer, & Rickie brought her back to Olive St. She was tired and going up the stairs to the apartment was more exercise than she's had in at least 2 weeks. But, she's back in her bed and hopefully slept well last night. Bob & Fischer are looking forward to meeting everyone at the climbing gym tonight for the benefit. As for KO showing up...unlikely, but you never know with Katie - where it would be a "definitely not" for most mere mortals, she could rally...? If not, I'm sure there will be lots of photos and she will rest and recover some more.

See you tonight if you can make it to the gym. Otherwise, thanks and keep checking for more updates. T

Sassy Lassie

Hey O ! Time for the daily update. As we are all digging out of mounds of snow up here and thinking of powder days and cold smoke, KO is in her lovely room with a view and is eyeing tomorrow as a possible discharge day! Bob reports that she took a lap around ICU with her walker, sassed and joked with the nurses (really - true story!) then was whisked in a wheelchair to the room she's in tonight. Yes, KO is out of ICU! She's feeling much better with the shunt in and as long as her stomach behaves, they'll let her come home. Now, the question is if Mother Nature will. We have had well over 2 feet of snow in the valley and at the moment the pass is closed to westbound traffic from Livingston. Pretty sure that should be open by morning, though. It's been a slippery, snowy mess, but everything looks great in the snow and it'll be a great welcome home present. So when they set her free, Bob & Fischer will be there to pick her up and get some great family time coming home. Woo Hoo, KO!

Thanks for tuning in, more tomorrow - T

Smooth Sailing

Well - evening, everyone! Sorry for the late post, but was just waiting on some news back from Billings before I got to writing. Bob called to report the shunt placement went well - KO said it felt like the whole thing happened really fast and was over in no time at all. She's feeling well and is back in her ICU room for hopefully only one more night. If she's doing well in the morning, they'll step her back down to the room she was in before - the one with all the windows and the nice little couch : ) Then, providing there are no setbacks and all is well enough - she'll probably be able to come home on Friday...WooHoo!

When we left the hospital on Monday, it was into the full on beauty of a Montana, blue sky, autumn day. The simple act of being able to walk outside, feel the warm sun on my back, and smell the fresh air was suddenly a very big and real thing. Something to be treasured and enjoyed - for Katie in her windowless room, and for me - a gift of now. It's a gift I want to remember every day, Katie...thank you. Come home soon. We love you.

Thanks for tuning in, more tomorrow. T

It's Shunt Time

Welcome back to the KO Blog - and the latest update for Katie. She hasn't had any big changes today but the big decision today was to opt for the shunt to be placed. So, tomorrow Katie will have a little more surgery and the shunt should do the job of keeping that CSF fluid from backing up and causing symptoms. The hope is that if everything goes well, she might come home as early as Friday, but possibly Monday. After that, it is time to recover amongst friends and family. Fischer told me today he really hopes she comes home on Friday, but then said he knows it might be Monday. He was very excited, though that Ziggi was coming home tonight! Bob will head to Billings tomorrow to be there for the operation. Hopefully everything will go smoothly - this is a pretty common procedure, and certainly not as complicated as the other neurosurgical stuff Katie's already been through, so here's to smooth sailing tomorrow!!

For those who are wanting to send something Katie's way,(unfortunately no flowers in the ICU) the biggest help will likely be needed when she gets home. Well wishes, cards, flowers, the Benefit Fund (see upper left of blog for details), and there is a fund-raising event for Katie this weekend at the Spire Climbing center in Bozeman, and anything else people can think of they want to do I bet would be welcome. the climbing benefit is on Saturday, November 14 from 5-7pm. It is a potluck, climbing fest with all gym fees going towards the Katie Ossa Benefit Fund. Those with questions can see the attached info or call (406) 586-0706 for details. Otherwise if all you can spare right now is good chi, prayers, hugs, love - that currency is equally important and will help Katie, Bob, & Fischer tremendously.

For tonight, I hope you rest well Katie, and I will write more tomorrow. Thanks for tuning in. T

Tired Girl

It's T - back to blog more for KO, with some first hand news for you all today. Ron & I drove over to visit Katie in Billings and got to her room around mid-morning. She had been sleeping much of the morning and her nurse (nice fella named "Ted") checked to see if she wanted us to stay for a visit. She was happy to see us and have company for a little while. She's very tired and weak, and feeling confined (her room has no windows) - looking forward to the possibility she could get out of the hospital by the very end of the week - but knowing this could be optimistic. It was so good to see her, but even with our short visit, she tired quickly and needed to sleep. So much of her recovery right now is resting and allowing her brain to recover from recent and probably the cumulative stress of the illness. It's hard when the brain is tired and healing to put any extra effort into anything - she said that right now it feels too much to even want to pick up her phone (yes, Katie actually said that!). So all her efforts are going into getting better, for now. But she still sports the best bald girl head ever and still is her very beautiful self. She misses Fischer very much and Bob as he is back home for a couple of days so Fischer can still go to school and have some sense of normalcy in this whirlwind. Bob will head back over on Wed. to be with Katie, though. Katie's sister Rickie (met her today and got the right spelling - thanks, Rickie:) ) is in Billings and spends a lot of her day by KO's side to be on hand for information and company -and ventures out for runs during Katie's long naps.

The understanding is that the cancer causes an increase in the protein of the fluid in the spinal cord and around the brain. This makes the fluid thicker and it can't get by the area of scarring in the brain from the lesions/surgery. As the fluid backs up it causes pressure on the brain and leads to the headaches, nausea, and then the more significant symptoms like KO was having last week. The stent relieves the pressure but is only a temporary fix. A longer term fix may be a shunt from the brain to the abdomen, which is currently being discussed by the doctors and KO, Bob & Rickie. My understanding is that this fixes the pressure issue but the protein (cancer) issue is a different story.

Katie is as strong as ever inside, and even though the mere act of lifting her arm or leg makes her exhausted, she still has her sense of humor. It was wonderful to see her smile and even laugh a little. She is looking forward to getting home and back into life, again - even looking forward to the prospect of skiing this winter!! For now, if we can all send her strength and love and help her get strong to get home - I know they'll be needing more help and support after that. She is so thankful for the good wishes and thoughts coming her way and says hi to everyone. I know she hasn't had the strength to answer her phone, let alone check her messages - so if you respond here, I know Rickie is checking the blog and can read any responses right to her at the hospital. KO knows everyone is pulling for her and would love to hear from you, so feel free to send comments her way.
Thanks for checking in. T

So, KO - you are beautiful, and it was so nice to see you today. Keep resting and plodding forward - you're headed to the finish line (discharge from ICU) and soon as you know it you'll be home in Bozeman. We miss & love you! Love, T, R, & E

Good Enough To Eat

Hey everyone, T posting again and have an update from yesterday. So the stent is doing the job - Katie is feeling much better and getting back to her usual self. After a difficult early morning where she was feeling a little disoriented and still not sure why exactly she's in ICU, Rikki came in and helped her sort it out. Bob & Fischer & Grandma made their way over to Billings and Bob hung out with KO for the remainder of the day. By then she was feeling chipper and still is wanting to get the heck out of there. But, since the stent is keeping her from that, she requested a Subway sandwich, chips, & and had a bite of pumpkin pie - great to hear she's eating. Bob said she didn't need any pain meds yesterday and her nausea was under control without any medication either! Fantastic, Katie!!!

Unfortunately, the hospital has restricted any visiting children due to concerns about H1N1, so Fischer hasn't been able to go with Bob to see Katie. But the two of them are planning on heading over to the indoor water park this afternoon. Rikki will be in town for the week and it sounds like some other folks are planning on visiting Katie this week. Bob said that visitors are ok and familiar faces are welcome. Not sure how long she'll have to stay in ICU, the cytology report has to come back before anything more long term (and portable - like a shunt) can be placed. As of now, the report is expected on Monday. So that's it for now...things are looking up.

Not out of the woods, but getting better...

Hey all, T here again with the latest - it's been quite a whirlwind for the last 24 hours, but happy to say that Katie is feeling a little feisty, today. She's still in the ICU, but has made some strides since yesterday. To bring you all up to speed as to what has happened and what is going on...

So here's the skinny from Bob: Yesterday morning around 5 am, Katie slumped over and was unresponsive, her right pupil dilated. After a short time, this resolved and she became more responsive but had a number of these "episodes" and didn't really become fully responsive or awake. Sounds like there were concerns these were seizures or something else causing pressure on the brain, so she was sedated and intubated (breathing tube) and on a ventilator (breathing support so her brain didn't have to work so hard and could just rest) which is a very quick way to end up in ICU. CT scans of the head, chest, and abdomen apparently came back clear...good, but still no specific answers. Lumbar puncture (spinal tap) results showed higher pressure than the one done last week and elevated protein, Bob says further tests are pending to clarify the results.

The good news is that when the pressure was relieved after the spinal tap, Katie's pupil symptoms and episodes went away ... so a neurosurgeon was brought in to evaluate her to figure out how to keep the pressure down. A stent in the lower back is doing the trick and her fluid pressure is staying down which means... KO is now extubated (off the ventilator & no breathing tube), awake, talking (dropping "F" bombs), and already wanting to get out of the hospital! Sound like anyone we know?! WE LOVE YOU, KATIE O!!!

At any rate, it's nice to hear she's awake and talking, but there's still a lot of monitoring and assessing to come to find out if there has been any fallout from all this - as well as sorting out the Why?. So for now, she gets to stay in ICU and it's day to day. But for now it looks like the trees are thinning and maybe she'll be out of the woods, soon...?

Melanie & Bill and the girls went over to Billings last night and stayed with Bob, cooked him up a hearty breakfast, and went with him to the hospital this morning. Katie's sister Rikki (not sure if I spelled that right...) is coming in today and Bob's mom is here looking after Fischer. I stopped by to say "hi" to them this morning. Ziggi is in poodle paradise at Christie's.

I know Bob & Katie are so thankful for all that is being done physically, mentally, emotionally, metaphysically - every way, and so thankful for all their friends and family. I know it means so much for them that we are all "here" and "there" - so thank you for all you are and all you are doing, everywhere.

Stay tuned...

Surf divas Love You!!!

Fall Update (posted by T)

Well, if you've been wondering what has been going on in the world of KO since August, it's time to get caught up a bit. I will be posting for KO & Bob for a little while so they can concentrate on Katie's well being - but they also wanted to get everyone up to speed as they haven't really been able to return calls. Having said that, this update will begin with the most recent news which is that Katie is currently hospitalized in Billings due to her worsening symptoms. She was transported by ground ambulance last Friday from Bozeman to Billings as her symptoms were not responding well to treatment and her blood work showed the CA125 (Ovarian cancer marker) elevating yet again. She has had difficulty eating and IV nutrition has been mentioned. This morning Bob called me to request a Blog update and said Katie has now been transferred to the ICU. She had an episode of of unresponsiveness and elevated blood pressure. She has regained consciousness and Bob says she's awake and talking. Currently she is undergoing CT imaging and further diagnostics, hopefully we'll know more soon.

So, to catch everyone up from the last post...a review of the MRI by her neurosurgeon in Chicago revealed only one brain lesion in the frontal lobe. The recommendation was to treat with whole brain radiation and if any lesion remained then it would be back to Chicago for the gamma knife. Katie did 18 sessions of the radiation at the beginning of Oct in Bozeman and the final MRI showed all lesions were gone! However, the radiation seemed to be taking it's toll as she started having increasing headaches, fatigue, and nausea. Unfortunately, KO has had to spend a lot of time at home in bed because of feeling so poorly. In September, her CA 125 had gone up to 58, the first time it had been out of the normal range since before chemo. It was repeated after the radiation was finished in October and came back above 120. She has been in and out of the hospital during this last month as they have tried to figure out the reason for her severe headaches and how get her more comfortable. This last week has obviously seen her taking a turn for the worse and her CA125 is now 220.

Katie has had quite an autumn - a roller coaster ride might compare. She spent much of the late summer and early fall playing as hard as she could. Mountain biking, hiking, a little climbing, enjoying living in town, Fischer starting school and a trip to San Diego to learn to surf with 8 girlfriends (they all got up on their boards - woo hoo!) are probably some of the higher points. I know she's grateful for every moment and everyone, she lives in the present and plans for the future.

Well, I'll sign off for now and update when I get more from Bob. In the meantime, peace, love, happiness, prayers, vibes - everything good we send your way, Katie, Bob, & Fischer!

August 29, 2009

They say three times a charm? Bad luck happens in threes? Well, I spent yesterday in the ER and my MRI revealed another two tumors on my brain :(. This is just the preliminary report as my Neurological Oncologist has not seen it. I guess I'll be going to Chicago again and will have more surgery :(. I think its safe to say I'm not guite ready for this. Fischer starts Kindergarten this Wednesday and I want him to be stable there before Bob and I go off to Chicago for two weeks. We will probably pull him and bring him out again if it works out.

All I say is this disease sucks! I'm not gonna let it get the best of me so after this third time, fuck it! It's not gonna comeback! As things unrsvel I'll update the blog to keep everyone in touch.

Enjoy the weekend, I sure am gonna!

Love to All,
KatieO

Summer Update

Hello Everyone!

It’s been way too long since my last posting! I only see that as good as I have been Living my Life! Yea! We have sold our house, moved, finished a triathlon and received all good news for all my tests!

Fischer and I are on our way to visit our friends Donna, Carol and Carla on Cape Cod for a week. I am in desperate need of a beach vacation and to get away from the loads of boxes still unpacked at our apartment. We closed on our house on July 27th. We are going to rent for a few years, make sure the market goes up, before we buy again. We bought high, sold low and now will wait to buy high again! Just kidding! We want to see where my health will take us. I just need to get a few more tests under my belt to feel secure. My 6 week MRI looked great. My blood work started to go up after my surgery but the doctors weren’t too concerned, I was. It started to show a trend of creeping up and the last one started coming down, whew! I guess it is from the surgery and the radiation. I was all slated for a CT scan last Friday but since the numbers were down, I canceled it. Its very difficult to live day to day thinking it may have come back. I talk myself down and try to just live every day for what it is, enjoying Bob, Fischer and my friends and family to the fullest extent.

I’m leading bike rides for The Wellness Community, our local cancer support network in Bozeman. Its fun and I’m meeting all kinds of fun people! We went down to Sheridan Wyoming so I could walk in my sister Ricki for the last 5 miles of her 100 mile run. She had “for my sister Katie” written on her bib! It was very inspiring for me and made me cry! I actually ran a bit of it with her and her son in law Chris. I did an Xterra triathlon a week and a half ago. I didn’t push it “too hard” and somehow managed to finish! They wrote up a very good article on the race in the local paper, check it out:

http://bozemandailychronicle.com/articles/2009/07/27/sports/000tri.txt


Several people have asked me to give talks this fall to hopefully inspire their audiences. This is exactly what I want to do and hope this is only the beginning. When Fischer starts Kindergarten this fall, I’ll start writing my 501c3 for my nonprofit Foundation. We’re gonna help A LOT of people, so get ready!

Love to you all. I think about how much support I get from all my family and friends and how I attribute my success in surviving to all of you. I couldn’t do it without all of you!
You are all my inspiration!

KatieO

It's cloudy, rainy cold weather here. I'm working on the bicycle program I'll be leading for the Wellness Community this summer. Its a six week session of rides, one per week, a part of Healthy Excursions which also includes hiking, fly fishing and kayaking. The bicycling portion starts at the end of July so I should be back into some semblance of shape by then. I plan on doing an Xterra off road triathlon on July 27th. It is just a sprint distance, 600 yd swim, 7 mile mountain bike on dirt roads and a 5k run on easy trails. I'm not supposed to run for two to three months out from surgery so I'll be running off the couch per say. I figure if I ride enough and do some hiking I'll be fine. It's all muscle memory, right?

I saw my oncologist here in Bozeman on Friday. Got a great report! They're gonna watch me like a hawk for a while. OK by me! I go to Billings for my one year check up with Dr. Gibb on Tuesday the 9th. (I was one year out from chemo on May 27th! YEA!) Then I get my 6 week MRI on the 18th of June. (six weeks from surgery) Then I'll have MRI's every three months for at least a year then we'll figure out what goes on from there.

A real bummer is that my hair is falling out where they zapped me with the gamma knife. I have a big bald spot that is fortunately still covered by hair that didn't fall out. I'm hoping that it will stay covered! Please, please, please! I'm so over the bald thing! I know it's kind of vain but I value my hair and what I look like. I think losing my hair was one of the toughest parts of my whole process last year!

I would like to thank all who have donated to the Katie Ossa Benefit Fund! There are quite a few who have wanted to remain anonymous so the Bank and I have decided to honor them and they are not printing off any copies of who has donated. The bank hasn't kept rack of the anonymous donors. Therefore I cannot send individual thanks as I would like. Please know that the money is going towards bills, Fischer's School, Insurance deductibles and so forth. We are so grateful for this and towards all of you who have so graciously helped us out.

Speaking of benefits. Dianna Hermann who is the acupuncturist, whose office I shared in my last years in Fort Collins, is having an acupuncture benefit clinic for us on June 9th. You can read about it and download a consent form on her website at:

http://www.acupunctureoftherockies.com/

Thank you Dianna for holding this clinic and to the Fort Collins Community for supporting us! Again I cannot express how much this means to us and our gratitude goes out to you all!

Well, time to go wash out some more of my hair. Let's hope it doesn't fall out entirely on the right side! I'm gonna be wearing a lot of scarves in the next few months!

Love to you all!
Katie O

Katie is home!

Hello to All! I'm home now! I got here Tuesday just after lunch. It felt so good to get home. Kind of surreal in that I was gone for two weeks and had brain surgery in that time frame!

I have to take it easy for two more weeks. My Doc in Chicago said to let my body heal for a month, then I can start doing things again. I will have to go in for another MRI six weeks out from surgery. They will keep a close eye on me. I can have that done here in Bozeman, thankfully. I do not need to go to Bilings for any more treatment, in fact Im done with this chapter and plan on continuing on with my life. The Gamma Knife surgery (stereotactic radiation) was the last part and I will not have to have any more radiation on this pea brain of mine. I'm DONE! :) Ovarian cancer rarely metastesizes to the brain, I just happen to be unusual. They say there is no reason that I can't live my full life and not get this back again. Of course as I mentioned, they will keep a very close watch just to make sure.

People are asking how I am feeling. I feel great. I am so relieved that this is over and that they were able to sucessfully remove the tumors and radiatate them out. I am veryoptomistic and see no reason why I can't lead a "normal" life. It really sucks to have to go a month without doing anything. I am ga=etting out of shape quickly. I'd guess if that is my biggest complaint than I'm doing very well. Maybe it hasn't hit me yet, I don't know, but I don't really think so. My motto is still FUCK CANCER.

I want to thank so many people that I can't even name all of you. Again, people have pulled through to help make this time of need turn into a wonderful learning and enriching experience for me. We couldn't have done this without our fabulous friends and family!

I go to get the rest of my staples out tomorrow. They took about thirty out on Monday and left in about 20. They are starting to itch! Since it is memorial day weekend, we're going camping! I can lay around camping just as much as at home and I'll get the clean fresh Montana air! I can't wait!

I'll update the blog again next week. Keep the emails coming, I enjoy hearing from all of you!

Love to all,
Katie

Family Time in the Windy City

Here's the latest from Camp KO in Chicago... Katie and Bob had a relaxing day on Tuesday - enjoying more of Chicago and waiting for Carol and Fischer to arrive. Unfortunately, thanks to typical Montana springtime, a snow squall hit just as the plane they were supposed to get on was arriving in the Bozeman area. It was diverted to Helena - so Carol and Fischer were rescheduled to leave first thing Wednesday morning. This time they got off without a hitch and arrived in Chicago in time to get settled in. In the meantime, Katie had her scheduled stereotactic radiation to treat the area from which the tumors were removed. The pathology confirmed the suspicions of ovarian cancer metastases. According to her doctor, Katie reports that this is uncommon but does happen and localized radiation is often effective. She'll have further workups when she gets home with her doctor in Billings. She said the procedure was not uncomfortable and really felt just fine.

Katie and Bob were thrilled to see Fischer and Carol and enjoyed some local Chinese food. Last night when I talked to Katie - she was relaxing after a long day, feeling well and happy to have the family together. So, now it is truly time for recovery and maybe enjoying Chicago a little, for real. Next up will be returning home. Currently Bob, Fischer, and Carol will come back to Bozeman on Saturday, and Katie gets her staples out Monday and can come home Monday or Tuesday. Quite the adventure, KO! Again - even though they don't have internet access at the condo - they are checking their e-mails, texts, and calls - I know they love hearing from everyone. I'll keep updating the blog as the news comes in, and until KO gets home and back online.

As for Ziggi - she is well and will be having a blast this afternoon wearing herself and Huck out! Such a great dog - KO!!

Until next time...

Back on Vacation

Katie is out of the hospital! She was discharged yesterday and she and Bob went back to the condo where she had a pretty good night's rest. Today the vacation resumes...so to speak. They had just returned from a walk to the nearby park (2 blocks away) where they had a nice time watching ducks and passersby from a park bench. Back to the condo for a bite of lunch, then nap for KO and errands for Bob. They are very excited to see Fischer tomorrow (and Carol too, of course!) They are both in good spirits and KO is sounding like her usually zoomy, happy self - welcome back Katie - way to go & keep up the good work (you too, Bob!)

I asked Katie if there was anything she wanted me to post specifically today. She wanted everyone to know that she's feeling better and things are going well. Above all, she and Bob wanted to say THANK YOU to everyone - for all your support, help, friendship...everything - thank you all! She says they are still without internet access, so you'll all have to bear with my posts for now and my blogging ineptitude : )

That's all for now - as usual, stay tuned...

T

Almost ready to go

Well KO is recovering well and has been moved from ICU to the regular floor - and rumor has it she'll be discharged tomorrow at the latest. Yesterday she walked around the ICU two times and according to her surgeon is recovering right on track. The intracranial pressure (swelling in the head) found yesterday was to be expected after surgery and is better today. Bob says Katie is tired, but otherwise seems fine. I talked to her briefly yesterday and she sounded really good. Amazing to be having a conversation with her 2 days out from brain surgery - KO, you are remarkable! The only thing that could make this Mother's Day better is to have Fischer there - and that happens in 2 days! Belated gift - and a great one at that. So, as long as things continue on this path, they will be back at the condo tomorrow, and localized radiation is scheduled for Wednesday (once pathology reports are back). Maybe, with a little luck, they'll all be home next weekend!

All for now... Happy Mother's day to you all.

T

The Girl Wants Some Broccoli!!

She walks, she talks, she wants some broccoli! In the latest installment from Bob, Katie is doing well. She was able to get up and sit in a chair for a bit today, snarfed down some yogurt and blueberries, and joking with the nursing staff (hard to believe KO joking with anyone - must be the brain surgery!). Not much pain today and she seems to be recovering well - but gets another night in ICU for now. Bob put her on the phone for a second and she sounded great - groggy, but KO all the way. Results are still pending on the lesions, so for now she gets to keep healing. Bob got her up to speed with some of her emails today and managed to sneak away for a nice run along the lake while Katie rested. A half hour of sitting is hard work for a recovering brain - so she did spend much of the day sleeping. At the moment, she had a hankerin' for some veggies, so Bob was off to the cafeteria...

Carol is coming up from Colorado to Bozeman and will accompany Fischer next week to Chicago. Some family time in the big city!! Anyone have some good beta on fun kid activities in Chicago?

Well, that's all for now - stay tuned...

T

The Road to Recovery

Update from Bob this morning:
KO got settled into her ICU bed around 6:30p last night - was awake long enough to be nauseated and have a searing headache, but some medication took care of that and she was able to rest. Bob talked to her briefly this morning when he called to talk to her nurse - got through to Katie's room instead & she picked up. She was still groggy and resting. He was on his way to see her when I talked to him. He's looking forward to when they get her up today for a little ambulating - (Day 4 itinerary - after brain surgery and a night's stay in ICU, have a nice walk across the room to the chair in the corner - Katie, I can just visualize the brochure!)
Amazing - brain surgery one day, up and walking the next! Go KO! I will update further as info comes in - meanwhile, keep the good vibes coming.

The donation account has been opened sooner than expected - please see info to the right. Thanks again from Katie and Bob for all the support, love, good wishes, prayers, and positive input. With a little luck maybe we'll hear from KO herself before too long...

More soon...
T

In Recovery

I just got off the phone with Bob - Katie is out of surgery and in the Recovery room! The surgeon was able to get all 3 lesions without involving any brain tissue. They didn't have to go in very deep, so any dizziness Katie has is expected to only last a few days. She is stable and was awake enough for Bob to talk to her for about 10 minutes. The surgery went well and tests are pending to find out exactly what these things are - results should be back in about 3 days. So, Katie is in holding pattern, waiting to get into her ICU room. Bob will have another chance to chat with her in a little while and will keep us posted.

Go Katie, GO!

We're all pulling for you - we know you can feel it!


As for the previous post - sorry for the confusion regarding the donation account, the EIN is taking longer than previously thought and the account can't open without it. So - everything should be a go as of early next week. Thanks for understanding.

T

Still Waiting

T here again posting for KO while she's otherwise occupied. I spoke with Bob this morning and although she was scheduled for 730am, they didn't get started until after 10 on the actual procedure. I will post more information as it comes in.

A donation fund for Katie and Bob is being set up through Stockman Bank here in Bozeman. If you are interested in sending a contribution, you can make checks out to: The Katie Ossa Benefit Fund

Due to delay in processing EIN for the account, contributions can be sent to the following address to be deposited when the account is opened next week, or directly to Katie and Bob - see address to the right.

Interim donation address:

Katie Ossa Benefit Fund
c/o Teri Dudzinski
1417 Cherry Dr.
Bozeman, MT 59715

The address of the bank is as follows - keep in mind they will not be able to process any contributions received until the account is open.

The Katie Ossa Benefit Fund
c/o Stockman Bank
1815 S. 19th Ave.
Bozeman, MT 59718

Thoughts, Prayers, Energy, Calm, and Peace we send to you, girl.

More soon...

this should have posted before the one Carla wrote!

Hello from beautiful Chicago!

We went out on the town last night. I drank a whole bottle of champagne by myself! (the good stuff of course) Seem to feel pretty good this morning! …guess theres something to say about steroids and hangovers, or just drinking really good champagne! 

Arrived here yesterday. Our flight left Bozeman at 6am so it was a rough start for Bob and I. We were exhausted when we got here. Cathy’s Mom’s place is absolutely fabulous! Beautiful views of the city, right near the lake and not too far from the hospital! I could handle this for about a week just as a vacation!

My friend Carla is here to help with our Doc’s appointment today. She is well versed in working with brain surgeons. While Bob and I sit there looking like deer in headlights, she can ask all the right questions, and remember them! She flew in from Boston, what an amazing friend and person! Her honey flies in from Liverpool for the weekend so she’ll be leaving tomorrow (Thursday). Thank you Carla!!!

Bob’s friend Bill is here in Chicago for business so he went out for dinner with us last night. He lives in Spokane. His wife ironically has a “bump” on her cerebellum too. What the….? They are “watching” hers. She has other health concerns and not a history of cancer. Godd luck to her and I’ll be her guinea pig for the surgery!

I will have Carla update this blog with some details once we see the doc today. We’ll get the hospital info of where I’ll be and all that pertinent stuff. I’ll be in ICU for a couple of days so nothing to be sent. In lieu of flowers etc, please see the Katie Ossa Benefit Fund info at the top. Every dollar will add up and that’s really what we need the most at this time. We’re going to have to pay for daycare for Fischer and Bob’s salary just got cut by 20% (whole firm across the board). I really have a difficult time asking for this but people want to know so that is how everyone can help.

Keep sending emails etc. I enjoy getting them. Brain jokes are funny, thanks!

Update written by Carla for Katie. I’ll have someone update after the surgery.

Thanks for allyour support and prayers!

We met with my neurosurgeon, Dr. Chandler, today. A confident man of few words, he seems very knowledgeable and makes us feel better about what is going to happen. In short, I have 2 lesions on my brain. Both are located in my cerebellum, one in the center and one to the right. There is a potential third mass that he may evaluate during surgery, but only if it is visible… needless to say he won’t go digging for it despite knowing it’s there. Surgery will be pretty straightforward and will not require shaving my head!! Woohoo! The surgery is expected to take ~2-3 hours and he will remove as much as possible from the masses. Following surgery, I will be in ICU and then moved to the floor. Approximately 5 days post surgery, I have to have stereotactic radiosurgery on all 3 masses. SRS is when they deliver a very high dose of radiation to a targeted area of the brain. This should kill any remaining cancer cells in the area. Luckily, I will not have to have any additional chemotherapy treatment. I will be routinely monitored every 3 months when I return home.

Dr. Chandler confirmed that ovarian metastases are very rare. Of course, we all know I’m pretty special!! He seemed very optimistic about my surgery and prognosis so that rocks. He also said a positive attitude is required in his OR so, Kick Ass Katie will be all smiles and good to go in the morning!

p.s. Did I mention they’re not going to shave my head!!! WOOHOO!!!

Here's the latest from Chicago - Katie asked me to post a little update until she can get internet access:

Katie and Bob are enjoying a mini vacation before (as she puts it) "the shit hits the fan". Internet service is a bit patchy at the moment but she is hoping to update the blog later today at the hospital after her doctor's appointment.  Yesterday they sampled the Windy City's offerings for lunch & dinner and today were out enjoying the sights along the lake.  And then tomorrow, brain surgery !  (Katie - who is your travel agent anyway?)  : )   She sounds in good spirits and is enjoying the moments as they come.  They have wireless access with her phone so can pick up emails, texts, and calls (really, phone calls on a phone! -  hasn't tried the automatic coffee maker application yet, though.)   

More soon - from the real deal...

T (KO's ghostwriter for the moment)

Latest and Greatest.....greatest?....what am I thinking!

We're home right now! Yea! It feels food to be here with Fischer and Ziggi,of course Bob too! Sleeping in my own bed. I went out last night to a show by Broad Comedy. A friend of mine was in it and it was totally hilarious!It was great to just laugh for two hours straight. I'm wanting to bike today, it's supposed to be in the 50's. I think it will be a while before I can go again and I want to get in as much as I can. I'm also trying to go crust cruising tomorrow up near West Yellowstone. When the snow gets cold at night it sets up and you can skate ski anywhere. The bummer is its supposed to be a bit warmer up there tonight and it may not be hard enough. Must Try!

We head to Chicago on Tuesday. I have a consult with my surgeon on Wednesday and then surgery will be on Thursday. At this point the doctor's arrainger person ( funny how I can't think of what to call her) says that we should book our return ticket for May 22nd. Thats kind of long time!

We're trying for figure out what to do with Fischer. Grandma is coming down on Monday and I think can stay for quite a while. What a relief! He loves speding time with her! I'm not sure if she can stay for the whole time but we're working on it. We're even wondering if we should fly him and her or a Nanny type person out there for a few days so he can see I'm dong fine. Of course thats after I get out of ICU and will maybe be coherent! We'll see, we've got some time to play around with these ideas.

Ok, so they say I will still be "Katie" after this brain surgery. The cerebellum plays the role of alance and coordination and y'all know that's whi I do forward sorts anyway. I'm telling them I think I've had this for all my life! :) The initial surgeyr will affect my balance/coordination but should hopefully get better. Thats the one thins that they say may have some permanance. Please just let me ride my bikes! ( I know, most of you think I need help NOW with balance on my bikes!)

I'll have someone, not me!, update this blog with what is happening after the surgery. Everyone is asking what they can do. It's difficult for me to ask for this and I know after last year that I was getting better at asking for what we need. Some friends are setting up a bank account here that people can donate to. We're gonna need to pay for child care for Fischer and these extra medical costs are gonna really hit below the belt. Bob's work just decreased their hours and pay last Monday by 20%. We were going to supplement by me picking up some massage gigs....not any more. Our house is on the market and we desparately need to sell it. Bozeman be prepared, If we get an offer and have to be out, you may be asked to pack boxes! The mortgage payments are way too high for us to handle without me working at all. So..... we're desparate. I'll put up the information as soon as I get it.

I'm gonna farm out some of my recipies for people to make and put in our freeer. That way we have the food we know we'll eat for a vegetarian, a five year old and a not all brain cell patient! (someone could come up with a joke about that!, Molly T?)

Yes, I'm freaked. I'm trying to not worry too much because whats up there is whats there and I really want it out. I can only hope that its not the concer thats come back but there is a huge reality about that. If it is they will do radiation and then chemo via IV. The only thing that sucks is I really DON"T want to lose my hair again! I guess in the shole scheme of things I could lose a lot more so I should be thankful!? (Of course thats n a perfect world.) I'm planning on fighting whatever this is with even more gusto than I did last year! I'm going to need a lot of support, which is why I'm reaching out to so many of you. I LOVE getting emails of encouragement from everybody and also hearing about what is going on in your lives. It lets me live vicariously through you and makes me happy. I'm getting a lot of calls. Know that I'll try to answer If I can't I'll try to get back to you. If I don't you can try again but know that it gets very tiring to talk all day long on the phone. (of course y'all know I'm a talker!) Just dont be afraid to call but know I may not get back to you. Same thing with emails, I try to respond but can get overwhelmed, just keep them coming!

Snail mail:
Katie Ossa
198 Nostalgia Lane
Bozeman, MT 59715

korunnergirl@yahoo.com

I'm on facebook, so ask to be your friend, isn't that silly?

I'll get my hispital information up as soon as I know it.

Thank you all so much, plese put all thoughts, prayers, energy or whatever you do out there!
Love to all,
Katie

Ok, I know y'all are getting antsy. I know I am. Right now I'm on Decadron (sp) a steroid that reduces swelling and for me it's like being on speed . Not that I've ever taken speed but I can imagine. I'm really driving Bob crazy. (Bob says you are supposed to read this really fast to get the full effect!)

I was supposed to have brain surgery tomorrow at 7:30. The Neurosergeon here is just a general surgeon and my oncologist in Bozeman was not comfortable with that so he called around and got me into a specialist at North Western Memorial Hospital in Chicago. This guy is the Surgical Director of Neuro Oncology and is a Neurooncologist. I just got released by my doctor and am waiting for my dismissal ppers. Then a two hour drive home, of which Bob has to do because I'm not allowed to drive.

I need to have surgery to remove these two "lumps", "masses", or what ever you choose to call them. It is a pretty involved surgery and can have some temporary and possibly permanent side effects. Mostly my balanc and coordination. My doc here says I will still be the Katie everybody knows and loves, (not some drooling idiot) :) Nobody knows if this is mets from the ovarian cancer or not. They will find out during surgery. If it is then they will give me radiation and some other chemo that can go to my brain. I can do both of those in Bozeman. There is a possibility it is not even cancer and again they won't know until they get in there.

My spirits are pretty good, especially on this steroid. Now I know why athletes use the stuff, I feel like going out for a 100 mile run right now! I am freaked out a bit but also know that my best option is to get these things removed and go forward from there. So much for my climbing trip to Lander in May! I'll have to go in June or omething!

Just got sprung, I need to get outta here! Will write more tomorrow. Going home to Bozeman and will probably leave for Chicago Sunday. Will let you all know.
Thanks for all the support, texts, emails and phone calls that I haven't been able to return!

Love to all,
KatieO

Here in Billings! I had a Ct scan of my chest, as and pelvis an they all came out clean! Yea! My Oncologist is pretty optomistic about these lesions on my brain but the Neurosurgeon is a bit freaked out. He says he ca't biopsy them and they just need to come out. They're looking for a Friday surgery. He thinkd they have a role with the ovarian cancer and that I should be prepared for that. In the meanwhile my oncologist is calling around the nation talking to neuro-oncologists to see if what they are planning ondoing is the best thing for me. I completely trust him and will discuss his recommendations when he has all his info gathered.

I'm really scared. I don't want my brain cut into. They need to take out a window sized piece near the occiput (lower back skull) and then remove the tumors. Then they take a piece of my TFL and replace the dural matter then replace the bone. The whole process takes about 5 hours. (I think I;m gonna have a BIG headache after that! Guess I'll be in ICU for a couple of days then here at the hospital for a week. Yucko!

They're talking about placing some chemo tablets into my brain before they close it up. It will help to get rid of anything that may be left over.

ill write moretomorrow, I'm tired tonight. Bob is watching the BB game and I will fall asleep to it!

Thanks for all your letters of encouragement!

Love,
Katie

Well, we're at it again! I had an MRI yesterday (april 28th) due to the headaches, slight dizziness and disturbed vision I've been having. They found two masses, rather bumps, on the posterior section of my cerebellum. I'm heading over to the Billings Clinic today (april 29) to be admitted to the hospital. My oncologist sees this as the best way for me to get into a neurosurgeon asap. They need to biopsy them to see what they are. So far I have two great things going for me. One, ovarian cancer SELDOM goes to the brain and two, my oncologist, granted he is a "below the belt kind of guy" (gynocological oncolgist), says they look like they are fluid like and fluid usually doesn't mean malignant. So keep your fingers crossed!

Don't know how long I'll be over there. Fischer is staying in Bozeman with friends and Grandma is coming down this weekend to be with him. He is a trooper and we have told him everything and he knows I'm pretty scared.

I'll try to have this blog updated by friends. The hospital doesn't have internet, at least not last year! I'll answer my phone if I can but won't talk for long. It gets me exhausted.

someone wanna buy a house?

Love to all,
Katie